Not Surprising

We were discussing the Thanksgiving holiday with the girls and all the yummy foods we were making, when we got to gravy they looked confused.

L: what's gravy?

S: it's a topping you pour on turkey and mashed potatoes; its delicious

L& H still confused looking : but what does it look like?

S: it's brownish and liquidy

L&H both turned their confused face to a sort of disgusted look.

S: it looks like liquid poop.

Nice.  Needless to say they did not try the gravy.

The Log

I'm trying to get some work done when L walks in and asks me if I've seen H's log?  H's Log?  What are you talking about?  She says her poop log!  So I walk into the bathroom and sure enough she is pooping away.  They must have been discussing it because there is a chair in there along with a roll of toilet paper wrapped in a ball. L explained to me I was going to need it for such a big log. 
Yes, sure enough there is quite a log in the toilet.
H gets up and assumes the usual postion for me to wipe and L says eww there's a turd, which there wasn't.  Then she says how gross she is and runs off.
I'm not really sure why L is calling H gross when she is the master pooper.
I'm pretty sure all these poop, log and turd conversations are a result of their Daddy.

Worse than poop Words

After writing the post on Steve and his lovely poop songs I realized, thanks to KKS, that I do need to lighten up a bit.  Although singing and using poop words is inappropriate it is very entertaining and the laughter that comes from them over rules all else. With that said I think I need to draw the line at the following 3 comments.  Now before I list them I must tell you that this all happened before he left for work at 9:30 and we didn’t even get up until shortly after 8.

1. after the dogs had a wrestling match, one dog humped the other dog as a sign of dominance whatever happens all the time.  Steve proclaims, "lick her in the front poke her in the rear!"  This was immediately followed by L saying, "lick her in the rear!"
2. reminding the girls to wipe only from front to back Steve says, " front to back but don't touch the sac."
3. And lastly after I gave him a look of death for the constant foot in the mouth he tells me "cool your jets Momma."

I'm not too sure how long this man is going to live.

Poop and Other Lovely Words

I, more often than I feel I should, have the conversation with Steve that he has to watch his mouth around the girls and act more like a father/role model and not a big brother.  Just this morning I shot him a look as the girls were giggling.  His response, before my head was even turned all the way towards him, was "I know.  I just can't help it."  This was after he was singing some sort of poop song while we were eating breakfast.  He was even  all dressed up and ready for work.  I don't know if that should matter but typically people tend to act in accordance to how they are dressed?? No?  The look on his face was remarkable because he looked genuinely concerned that he has no control over the words that come out of his mouth.  As if some little man lives inside him and just blurts words out.  He looks...truly...baffled.  Amazed that we even have these conversations.  Amazed.